The Number 23 - 2007 * * * *

The truth with find you.

I started this film about a year ago and didn't get more that about 10 minutes into it before deciding it wasn't for me.

I watched it properly a few days ago and was totally blown away.

The beauty of this film is that try as you might you will automatically start finding the number 23 in everything as soon as you have finished the viewing, and it will stay with you for a long time.

Jim Carrey in his first non-comic role ( for me) was amazing to watch and really filled the screen with his presence. I think he is an amazing actor.

The film centres around fate and chance and what happens when the 2 things collide. Walter (Carrey) is in a happy marriage to his wife and muddles by at his job as animal controller. One evening on the way to a party, his wife finds a book called 'The Number 23' in the second-hand shop that appears to have been produced by hand. On impulse she buys it for Walter and so sets off a series of events that question everyone's sanity.

It is scary actually to see how many famous events have happened that all relate to 23 ( either the equal to or the variation of) i.e. Kennedy's Assassination, Shakespeare's birth and death, Two planes hit the World Trade Center on 9/11/2001: 9+11+2+0+0+1 = 23 etc. You really can find it in many things.

An amazing film. See it now!

Disclosure - 1994 * * * *

Sex is power.

I am having a late 80s early 90s movie phase at the moment and had decided fairly early on that Disclosure was one of the films I had to see. This supposedly was one of 'the' films of the 90s to see and apparently it was a popular date movie for a time ( although I can't imagine finding tis in any way romantic!)

Michael Douglas yet again (as in Fatal Attraction) appears as a man who has a devoted wife and daughter but who cannot help himself when an ex-girlfriend of his ( Moore) turns up at his office as his new boss.

In one scene ( supposedly the most erotic ever....er..no) Moore makes a pass at Douglas and despite his 'no no no' (said in a very half-hearted and unbelievable way) things get a bit out of hand.

We are then supposed to feel sorry for Douglas ( again like in Fatal Attraction) when he refuses to tell his wife what has happened and sets out to cover it out, only to be hit smack bang in the middle of his face by a lawsuit sueing for sexual harrassment from Moore.

What I really liked about this film was that for once a woman was in charge and taking control of what she wanted ( not to say for one second that the act of sexual harassment is acceptable) and the man is being punished for not having enough will-power to actually say no and mean it. Added to which Moore puts in a very good and realistic performance when she is called to testify against Douglas.

A film to watch, and one that you will keep looking at from time to time ( such as I do with Indecent Proposal and Fatal Attraction.)

The Perfect Getaway - 2009 * * *

6 Strangers, 2 Killers, no getting away.

Every year I find a list of a few movies that I try my hardest not to rush out and see, knowing that I will be saving up some scary/brilliant experiences if I bide my time and wait a while.

'A Perfect Getaway' was one of them.

The premise seems brilliant - a newly married couple go to Hawaii on their honeymoon hoping to relax and enjoy one another's company. They also meet 2 other couples who seem to be perfectly respectable if not a bit kooky. The bomb drops when they are all informed by another group of tourists they meet that 2 killers ( a man and a woman) are commiting murders on the island. the question is, who are they?

Up until the end I'll admit that I was totally stumped. I had no idea who it could be, regardless of how many reviews I have read where the viewers knew almost immediatly. When I did finally know, I was confused but also pleased that I had had no idea previously. Some parts don't add up though, and there are certain plot holes that you can only really notice if you see it again.

Give it a watch though, you might be one of the ones who figures it out ( but I doubt it.)

Plenty - 1985 * * * *

Meryl Streep was on top form in this film about a woman's quest to feel the same excitement that she felt whilst serving in the 2nd World War.

She takes her place alongside actors such as Charles Dance and Ian Mckellen as she meets lovers, friends and a husband who ultimately drives her completely mad.

I cannot speak highly enough of Meryl Streep, I think she is brilliant in every sense and I am slowly working my way through her huge backlog of amazing performances.

This is one of those films where you don't think it will be much good, and finish it realising you will be thinking of it for days.

Caddyshack - 1990 * * * * *

Some people just don't belong.

I mentioned in my previous post (The Hangover) how America hadn't really churned out many good comedies for at least ten years. Well this film is now 30 years old and still as hilarious as I can imagine it was when it was released.

Bill Murray is always funny; he has an ability to make somebody laugh simply by looking at them with a sneer on his lips.

Chevy Chase plays his usual 'National Lampoon' slightly simple but fairly harmless character.

The fun centres around a golf club ( with a hilarious toy beaver who runs through the tunnels underground with brute force, aware of his impending threat of extermination by Murray's sinister yet hilarious Carl, the pest control/odd job man - probably some of the funniest bits in the film as he seems constantly stoned!)

The club seems set to be taken over by a yobbish and undiginified individual ( played excellently by Rodney Dangerfield) which does not go down very well at all with Judge Smails (who I swear is a ringer for an old Frank Sinatra!.) Amidst all this chaos the caddyshack boys are causing trouble as they try to suck up to the Judge and golf tournaments are running amok as the wealthy men battle it out with... well the even wealthier!

I'm not saying this film doesn't have some random ( and to be honest totally pointless sex scenes-references) but on the whole it is more of a slapstick attempt than anything else. And also tremendous fun.

The Hangover - 2009 * * *

Some guys just can't handle Vegas!

This film is funny, but it's not brilliant. I have yet to see a genuinely funny Hollywood comedy of the last 10 years surface. This is why I find earlier comedies so much better such as the classic screwball movies of the 30s and 40s. People didn't need to rely on sexual crudeness or swearing to make a film funny, most of the time it was done with brilliant timing and clever word-play.

But I am very old-fashioned in this way and not many people understand or appreciate movies where something drastic isn't happening. So this is fine. It kills time, its the story of a group of friends who go to Las Vegas for their best friend's stag do only to wake up the next morning with their friend gone and no recollection of the previous events that occured the night before. How hilarious. Isn't alcohol wonderful. What a totally ridiculous waste of a trip to Vegas!

Here we have to rely on the swearing and drink-filled obscenities that have become a Hollywood staple for 'young' audiences all over. Plenty of toilet jokes as well for people who aren't totally turned off by the previous subjects.

I'm not trying to sound like an old fogey, I did laugh but at the same time felt slightly embarassed that I was actually finding some of the scenes funny when they really don't take much imagination at all to come up with.

This is a great movie for young adults and I have no doubt it will be remembered for a long while to come, but only because it seems to be an accumilation of all the other sexual-tinged comedies that America has made in the last decade. Watch 'Bringing up Baby' instead, that's what real comedy is about.

Sigaw ( The Echo) - 2004 * * *

Don't open the door.

I was surprisingly scared by this movie. American horror is no match for foreign. The story follows a man named Martin living in a creaky and terribly run-down apartment complex. He regularly sees his girlfriend who comes to the apartment to see him. Things take a turn for the worse when Martin begins to hear and see a woman persistantly banging on his door and arguing with her abusive husband at the entrance to their flat down the way.

Although worried for the safety of the woman Martin doesn't want to get involved and so tries to close his mind to what's happening...

The Opposite of Sex - 1998 * *

You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll be offended.

Another film on my list of movies that people always seem to talk about that I have to see.

Christina Ricci plays DeeDee, a trampy and sexually promiscious teenage who, after fighting with her mother goes to stay with her gay brother and his boyfriend Matt. Before long she has seduced Matt and is pregant with his child thus causing them both to leave the home of her brother. Lisa Kudrow turns up as Ricci's brother's sister in law to offer support and annoyance at the situation.

The whole film is gritty and nothing like I had imagined it would be. In my mind's eye I saw it as some kind of comedy but it is anything but that.

Sex, Lies and Videotape - 1989 * * *

"All I have been thinking about all week is garbage. I mean I just can't stop thinking about it."

Andie McDowell will NEVER be a good actress and I don't care what anyone says. In everything I have seen she constantly acts as though she is trying to repeat lines she has learnt off a script in a very rigid and wooden manner. Her part wasn't much better in this, but at least James Spader was there to provide some proper acting.

This story centres around a couple, namely Gallagher and McDowell who are living a very unhappy and unsatisfied marriage. Even more so since Gallagher started sleeping with McDowell's sister on the sly. Unexcited by her life, McDowell finds solace in Gallagher's visiting friend Graham(Spader) who comes with a bizarre and unsteady past that she can only hope to uncover.

Spader is a great actor, and he portrays this pathological liar character superbly. I don't much care for Peter Gallagher or his character in this but he seems to keep popping up in films I am seeing without me realising so maybe it's a sign that he's not too bad.

Not one of the best films out there but one that people are always telling you to see, so go ahead.

Victor/Victoria 1982 * * *

She'd make it to the top... one way or another!

I think Julie Andrews is one of our typically 'English' actresses and I admire her greatly. I loved her in the other musical set in the early part of this century ( Thoroughly Modern Millie) and I thought she was pretty good in this too. Set in Paris in the 1930s the story follows Victoria, a lady who cannot get work because of her operatic style voice until she accidently meets a man who is also not getting work on the stage. The 2 form a close relationship and realise that the only way Victoria can make it big is to become a female impersonator, but that is only possible if you are a man isn't it...?

Without a Clue - 1989 * * * * *

Meet the world's greatest detective, and his bumbling partner... Sherlock Holmes.

This is one of the funniest films I have seen in a long time. The whole idea of the typical Sherlock Holmes stories is mixed up and changed round for the purpose of the film so we now have John Watson as the brains behind the operation and Sherlock Holmes as the rather simple but likeable fool who does nothing but mess up the doctor's plans. Watson's dream is to be known as John Watson - Crime Doctor but no one seems interested in him, instead focusing entirely on Holmes who gets through his detective work by Watson's subtle hints at all the clues. Ben Kingsley is brilliant and ever so funny as Watson, I intend to watch everything he has ever done, and Michael Caine provides a humorous glimpse into a world where Sherlock Holmes is an idiot - certainly not a case in reality.

Stealing Beauty - 1997

The most beautiful place to be is in love.

This film was seperated by a love or hate audience when it premiered in '97. I for one was in a mixed mind.
Liv Tyler plays a 19 year old girl escaping to Italy ( beautifully shot scenery that makes you fall in love with the Italian countryside) who has to come to terms with herself, her intact virginity and her relationships with the people she meets. This is very much a 'coming of age' film that not everyone will enjoy but it does have it's good points. For one Liv really lives up to the naive and innocent 19 year old and can act pretty well. Another good point is the appearance of Jeremy Irons who almost steals the film.

Lolita - 1997 * * * * *

A forbidden love.

After being blown away by the earlier version of this story, I seriously doubted that I would be as excited about the remake. Because who ever is?

However, after seeing it once I am desperate to watch it again, if just to see Jeremy Irons amazing performance as Humbert as well as Dominique Swain's characterisation as Lolita.

Although it is tempting I don't think there is any point in comparing the 2 films as they each have things about them that are better than the other. For example - Sue Lyons is probably the better and most realistic version of the 'Lolita' character, but we see a good deal more of Humbert's background before he arrives at the Hayes house in the modern film which is crucial for you to understand his character.

Each film is just superb and who cannot feel for Humbert despite the perverted nature of his person.

A bizarre and strangely beautiful story.

Case 39 - 2009 * * * *

Some cases should never be opened.

One of the things I liked about this film was that it wasn't just a 'typical' American horror film, and half way through it actually started to freak me out. The story centres on Renee Zellweger as a social worker who gets assigned to a case of supposed child abuse on a young girl. Going against everybody including her collegues, Zellweger takes it upon herself to 'save' the child, inviting her to live in her house and away from her supposedly psychotic parents, little knowing what she is actually letting herself in for.

I'm not mad on Renee Zellweger and she had the most irritating and dry looking lips throughout the film which was rather distracting. However her acting was quite strong and I was particularly happy to see Adrian Lester pop up as her manager ( although his American accent left a lot to be desired!). I guarantee you will not guess the outcome of this movie when you start watching it, and that is one of the things I love about films - when you suddenly get an ending thrust upon you that you are totally unaware of.

Worth a watch. Definitely.

Deliver Us From Eva - 2003 * * *

Lead us into temptation but...

Aside from the obvious 'Taming of the Shrew' part of this movie it wasn't really more than a typical American rom-com flick.

The story centres around Eva, who will not believe that men aren't just all the same and not interested in an intelligent and intellectual relationship. She constantly insults her sisters boyfriends and has no interest in finding one of her own until the sister's boyfriends take matters into their own hands and decide that if they can get a man to make Eva fall for him then they will get some time with their girlfriends. Enter LL Cool J. However as usual in films like this things never happen the way they are supposed to.

Not bad acting , I like Gabrielle Union since I saw her in 'Bring it On' and LL Cool J wasn't bad. This film is like a chick-lit novel, fun and silly but not to be taken too seriously.

Dead Scared - 2004 *

The thing with horror movies is that they don't necessarily have to be made on a high budget and many I have seen have managed to be low budget but still contained a great story. This on the other hand was both low budget, AWFUL and I mean awful and had one of the stupidest stories ( mainly due to the fact that it has been done so many times before I am fed up of it!)

In order for a group of 5 students to pass a weird and typically American ritual that makes them members of a certain club (god knows what the actual club is) they have to spend the night in ..... you guessed it ' a creaky old house.' 2 of the founder members of the club are secretly on hand hidden in the house to administer scares and 'pranks' throughout the night but they all get more than they bargained for ( what a surprise). Also there is the pointless nudity which I have never understood the need for in scary films except because the film is so dire the makers believe we will be temporarily be seduced by breasts and chests? Err, I'm not a bloke so no it doesn't work on me.

Added to which the 2 girls in it are so pathetic and fake it makes you want to vomit over the TV set ( one is actually called Amber Rose; if that isn't the name of an aspiring porn star then what is??)

Of course there is also one 'foreigner' ( in most horror films these range from anywhere that is not America or England) one 'jock' ( yet another American phrase for a male whore) and a supposedly intelligent but actually pretty sex-crazed chap ( they usually end up dead.)

If that hasn't put you off watching then nothing will.

An American Crime - 2007 * * * *

The Child's punishment became a woman's crime.

No one can fail to be moved and disgusted by this story. And with both movies ( this and The Girl Next Door) coming out so close together one cannot fail to look for similarities. One thing I did notice with this film was that it was as many reviewers have called it 'candy coated' so as not to upset the viewers. I am not for one minute saying that I want to be upset as a result of seeing the film but I feel that by covering over some of the particularly disgusting areas of the case that we are not fully understanding both the crime and the psychology behind this deranged family. Also we are effectively papering over Syliva Liken's life and death simply because we can't bear to hear about it and I think that is very wrong. If it happened we should be hearing about it so that nothing like this ever happens again. Although I think the acting in this was many times better than TGND ( Keener and Page were Oscar-worthy) I think the reality of the crime was portrayed in a more truthful way in the other film. Gertrude is seen in this as a flustered and hard-done by woman who only wants the best for her family and at the start of the film she does not come across as a particularly bad person. The reality was very different. Gertrude was a viscious and violent psychopath who hated Sylvia for everything she stood for ( mainly because she was pretty and sweet and pure unlike Gertrude's own daughter Paula). She tortured Sylvia with full compliance from the neighbourhood boys and girls even homing in on her daughter Stephanie's boyfriend Coy who was happy to oblige. The film was good as a horror film might be with no truth in it but as regards to portraying a real life case it didn't do very well and I think insulted Sylvia's memory.

2 Great actors there though who thoroughly deserved awards for their performances (and you might remember Jeremy Sumpter as Coy who played Peter Pan in the film).

St Trinian's 2: The Legend of Fritton's Gold 2009 * * *

They're back.

After discovering that Camilla Fritton is related to a pirate from yonder-year, the girls set out to discover wher ethe treasure that he was so desperately after has now been stashed little realising that Captain Archibold Fritton is back, and very very much alive. Add a few new faces ( don't worry, Colin Firth is still there) and a load of old ones and you're in for a bit of excitement. The girls looked like they had great fun making this sequel and it is a good old laugh although for me personally the first one preceeds the latter.

Diary of a Madman - 1963 * * *

Weapons won't save him.

Guy de Maupassant is one of my favourite french writers and I actually didn't register that he was responsible for the short story that this movie was made into until I looked at the credits. Now I think back I realise this is exactly the kind of thing he would have written. By the time of writing Maupassant was already going mad and there were many admirers of his work who believed that this short story was actually a reality for him and that he wrote as he saw things happen. Such a waste of talent for him to soon afterwards try to commit suicide. However this film is based on that story and centres around Vincent Price's character who believes he is being visited by the devil who controls his thoughts and feelings towards people he considers friends. Although of course there cannot be a Price film without a small amount of 'camping up' this is still a genuinely creepy picture. I am now deserate to read the story.

Diary of a Madman - 1963 *

The Visit - 1964 * * *

Hell Hath no fury...

I remember briefly at university studying this play but I didn't really understand it then. I still don't entirely understand it but think the film-makers did a pretty amazing job of it anyway. Bergman is still beautiful even now in the 60s and puts her all into this tale of corruption and society values.

Clara arrives back at a town she once knew very well a long time ago. Everyone remembers her and she in turn is particularly happy to see certain people. Or is she? Before long the past has collided with the present and the village is looking at a murder charge which hasn't happened yet.

Watch this.

Stan Helsing - 2009 * * *

The monsters have met their match.

Honestly you can't expect too much from a Scary Movie franchise that keeps churning out more and more of these movies. There are a few odd laughs but generally they just serve to annoy. Well I thought Stan Helsing was actually pretty funny although there were parts that I think just sullied the film. The monsters were mildly amusing and I guess having 'the big funny black guy' 'the innocent sex-crazed blonde' etc are just the way society and Hollywood in general thinks these days. In fact it really lives up to most of the American Pie-esque cliches and that got on my nerves but if you blotted that out of your mind you could just enjoy it as a silly movie.

Unfaithful - 2002 * * *

Where do you go when you've gone too far?

The one thing that struck me about this film was how unsympathetic the characters were. The lead role ( played brilliantly and infuriatingly by Diane Lane) is a dreadful character! Her loving and supportive husband goes out everyday to work while she does whatever housewives claim they do all day except live off their husbands. To make matters worse not only is she spending his money but she then starts a fling with a totally random man she meets in the street on a windy day. DO NOT tell me this is some kind of metaphor for being 'thrown together' and the 'It just happened' crap that has become such a popular expression nowadays. Above all we are supposed to feel sorry for her when things start to go downhill and I urge anyone watching this movie to feel anything for her but annoyance. How totally degrading to be a man who is bringing home money to support your wife when she has decided to start seeing someone else because she has become 'bored'! Bored of what exactly? Bored of going to coffee shops and sitting around in an idle fashion? Try making your own money!

Brilliant acting ( for which I ahve awarded 3 stars) but as regards to the plot. Please.

Halloween 2 - 2010 * * * *

Never trust anyone.

I still fail to see why Malcom McDowell has to appear in these films and I make no exception here, his part appears pointless and just ceases to stupify the film. I thought this was loads better than the first Halloween remake. However Sheri Moon Zombie wandering around in a white dress with a horse by her side in a dream-like state was a bit stupid. Some nice gruesome killings to bring the calibre of the film up to speed again so that's something. Nothing to do with the original Halloween 2 though.

The Final Destination - 2009 * * * * *

Rest in pieces.


I have seen all of the Final Destination movies and this by far surpresses all the others. The killings are brilliantly thought out, the story is really individual ( although still settling with the whole 'vision before you die' aspect that makes the 'Destinations' unique). The ending was pretty good as well and may of the scenes made me want to hide behind the sofa. A must for anyone who has been an avid fan of the other movies in the series, I think this would be a great high to end the series on so hopefully this is the last one.

She Done Him Wrong - 1933 * * *

Mae West is really something else. She's totally different in style, personality and appearance from any other actress of the 30s. Sure Jean Harlow was blonde, and Gloria Swanson had style, but Mae West seems light years ahead of her time when it comes to sexualising herself or telling crude jokes. Many of her quotes are still famous today because of their shocking content and you can see here why she is still so amazing. To be honest the story isn't really up to much, but if it means getting to see Mae West wear extravagent dresses and mutter her now infamous 'come up and see me some time' like with a smirk and drawl is priceless.

Blood Creek - 2009 *

The nightmare has awakened.

My partner said this was a huge flop and not worth wasting time on but sometimes we vary on films we see and so I gave it a shot anyway. What an idiot I was. This film screams out for help and for a realistic storyline. The idea that we meet a man whose brother is presumed dead in action and who then turns up randomly hell-bent on shotting some random man who lives ages away on a farm is stupid. The fact that the brother then gets his brother to help him and they both go around shooting people and keeping some people hostage but oooo half of them are already dead is hardly practical. I won't go further, I have probably already ruined most of the film for you, but it may be better this way than you having to endure the garbage of nearly 2 hours. I normally hate it when people say they have 'wasted 2 hours of my life' but I couldn't agree more here.

The Ugly Truth - 2009 * * * *

The battle of the sexes is on.

I've heard this film slated on many reviewing sites and to be honest I was having doubts about whether I would last for more than 10 minutes.

A film where the leading man is a chauvinistic pig who thinks all women want horrible males is hardly the most appealing premise for a rom-com. However Heigl and Butler bounce off each other to hilarious effect including one hysterical scene featuring some vibrating pants. The thing I don't like about this movies is that the intelligent and independent women are always construed as loners or 'boring' if they are dedicated to their jobs as opposed to jumping into bed with loads of men in a short space of time whilst on a high of booze. However you can't take this movie too seriously and both actors are pretty good to watch so a good effort all round, although you know from the start what will happen at the end.

Sorority Row - 2009 * * *

They share a killer secret.

For a start, I wanted to see this really to see if Audrina from 'The Hills' ( one of my favourite shows) could act. Well I hardly had a chance to make my mind up considering she was out of the film almost as soon as it had started.

I've seen the original Sorority Row and it didn't do much for me. I thought the acting was rather dull and unexciting whereas in this remake I was freaked out, gripped and slightly scared. This almost never happens with a remake so I guess the directors were doing something right. The idea of never knowing who you can trust was fairly prominent in this film and the end did come as a surprise. The actresses all belong to a brand of American 'babes' who seem to appear in every new horror film that comes out so they were all familiar.

A scary film, a silly film but a bit of fun anyways.

St Trinian's - * * * *

School's a riot.

I had wanted to see this for ages, although being a typically 'girly' film did put me off it at first. Then I realised that if it was based on the classic St Trinian's movies with Alastair Sims then it couldn't be too bad.

The cast is brilliant, with special highlights from Rupert Everett ( who plays not just a man, but also his own twin sister - hilarious!), Colin Firth and Russell Brand.

The school is threatened with closure by Colin Firth and it is up to the girls of St Trinian's to save the day with a little help from their alcohol and drug-dependent teachers ( check out Rupert Everett's false teeth!). Fellow Cambridge student Lily Cole and 'the girl from 2 pints of lager' are amoung the girls at the school, but it's ok because you'll be guaranteed to recognise over half of them anyway which is good for a laugh.

Light and frothy fun with a tad of a dark undertone this is a film for anyone really, not just us girls.

Already Dead - 2007 * * *

It's never too late for revenge.

I've never heard of this but liked the sound of the title and actually the story didn't turn out too bad at all.

Based around a man's revenge on the murder of his son, we follow him as he meets the supposed killer of his child and find out how he copes and whether he can stay an innocent man.

Very good performances from both lead men backed up by Christopher Plummer. The end shocked me. Probably not worth a re-viewing though.

The Ramen Girl - 2008 * * *

She's on pins and noodles.

Not a bad film, 'the Ramen Girl' follows Brittany Murphy to Tokyo where a bad breakup with a boyfriend causes her to take solace in a Japanese restaurant where she is introduced to her first bowl of Ramen.
Captured by the dish, she convinces the owner to teach her how to make the perfect Ramen and along the way starts to analyse not just her food, but her life.
Murphy hasn't quite reached the pitiful state she had later on in the year as her drug-taking took over and so this was a pleasant enough film with some funny and heartfelt parts.

Crimes and Misdemeanors - 1989 * * *

A film about humanity.

Woody Allen films are never funny, more tragically farcical. His plots are never light and always tend to deal with intricate family relationships or his love for one woman who won't reciprocate his affections.

When a rich businessman tires of his affair with a beautiful woman he does the only thing he thinks will cause the least hassle on all parts - he gets his brother to hire a hit man to bump her off so she will never spill the details to his wife.

Meanwhile Woody Allen is trapped in a loveless and passionless marriage and spends his days going to classic films with his niece and dreaming up ideas for films he could make. His whole life is unfulfilled and agonising for him.

I do like Woody Alen very much and although he tends to deal with dreadful subject matter I can usually raise a smile at his ridiculous over-the-top attitude.

Jack Ketchum's The Girl Next Door - 2007 * * *

Murder became the neighbourhood game.

Few people are unaware of the disgusting and brutal murder of Sylvia Likens by Gertrude Baniszewski in 1960's America. It shocked everybody. This will shock you too. The film is based roughly on the events that led up to the torture and death of a young girl who, along with her younger sister are taken in by a friend of their parents after they die. Little does the child know that her nightmare has just begun.
A heartbreaking and brutal film made all the more gastly by the true story factor, this is a film that should be seen, if only to show how vile our society has become.

Mr Skeffington - 1944 * * * * *

She was very lucky that Mr Skeffington was such a gentlemen!

I have yet to see a movie where Bette Davis doesn't totally light up the scene and this was no exception. I am very fond of Claude Rains and have seen a number of his films now ( he reminds me of Ronald Colman) and had heard great things about this movie. Set in the time period just before the 1st world war we are introduced to Fanny Trellis, a beautiful and vain young girl who lives in a beautiful old house. Her life is a constant series of proposals from eligible young men all desperate to win her hand but in reality she is not interested. After an embarassing incident where Fanny finds out her brother has been scamming the place he works at she meets Mr Skeffington, the manager of her brother's office. A few days later they are married, but Mr Skeffington is soon to realise that Fanny Trellis will not change her attitude or lifestyle for anyone, not even him.

The scale of acting in this film is extraordinary and both Rains and Davis are brilliant together. I couldn't help but cry towards the end of the movie when Rains gives a heartbreaking performance.

A must see for anybody who wants to watch 'proper' acting.

What's New Pussycat? - 1965 * * * *

How you cats will laugh!

Now this was a FUNNY film. Sellers is hilarious as a psychologist who has a tough life dealing with all his crazy and mentally unbalanced patients including sexually promiscuous women ( most of whom take a fancy to him) and a sexually promiscuous male ( who takes a fancy to all the women and is unable to commit to his fiancee). Add a load of ridiculous situations ( including one of the most slapstick sequences in a hotel I have ever seen) and a small appearance from the beautiful Ursula Andress and you have a film that is quite literally a laugh a minute.

There's a Girl in my soup - 1970 * * *

A saucy romance.

I am on a Peter Sellers rush at the moment. I watched this today hoping to escape back to the 1970s and I found I almost did. Sellers meets Goldie Hawn one night and a brief 'relationship' they go away together to all the smart and posh events that are Sellers' life ( he is a food critic) which are incidentally all the types of events that Hawn is NOT accustomed to leading to some embarassing but funny circumstances. Goldie Hawn is a pretty funny actress and I normally like things that Sellers is in, so a good choice for a Saturday viewing.

The Boat that Rocked - 2009 * * * *

On Shore, off air, out of control.

After hearing of the history of Radio Caroline from my dad I was excited to see this movie, based on the infamous pirate radio station that was broadcast illegally this film centres on the lives of the DJs who, although illegal, were bringing amazing music to many people. Notable performances from Kenneth Branaugh, Rhys Ifans and Bill Nighy and a fantastic soundtrack make this film a must see for anyone who has ever been interested in pirate radio or just simply appreciated good music.

The Fantastic Mr Fox - 2009 * * * 1/5

Dig the Life Fantastic.

I wasn't sure what to expect from this movie as I have been a fan of Roald Dahl's work for years. This movie is aimed more at the mature fans of his work as opposed to the children but there still is something for everyone.
After getting trapped in a net with his pregnant wife trying to steal a chicken from Mr Boggis's farm, Mr Fox swears to her that if they make it out alive he will never go back to his old ways.
12 Years later and his cousin and the son come to stay and Mr Fox decides to plan the biggest robbery of his life, but it will come at a price.
Very good animation/puppetry and some unforgettable voices. It certainly gives a whole new take on the Mr Fox that I loved as a child.

Apres Vous ( After You...) 2003 * * * *

A Tasty comedy with a twist.

Daniel Auteil is becoming a staple actor in my various viewings of French films. He is extremely versatile and I find his comic efforts perfect.

One night, on the way to his girlfriend's house, Antoine comes across a suicidal man named Louis on the brink of hanging himself from a tree. After saving his life he allows Louis to stay with him and finds him a job as a wine taster in his smart Parisian restaurant. Believing he can help Louis he tries to track down the reason for his near-suicide attempt, his ex-girlfriend Blanche, with hilarious and heart-warming results.

All round good fun and a typical gentle comedy that only the French can do so well.

Chase a Crooked Shadow - 1958 * * * * 1/2

The Man Hunts the Girl, the Girl Hunts the Man.

Ok I would never have known or guessed that this was a B-movie until researching it online. The acting was really brilliant ( Herbert Lom gives excellent support as the police officer) and I was amazed by the story. I usually guess the twists that are about to come at the end of mystery type films but I was totally knocked back by this one!

Anne Baxter's character Kim retires late from a party to her room one night to find a figure standing outside her balcony. He claims he is her brother. Her brother is dead. From then on Kim must risk everything to make the police believe her before it is too late.

A really amazing film. The end will blow your socks off.

All About Steve - 2009 * * *

For god's sake stop tanning! You look like an orange with lips!

I'm not a huge fan of Sandra Bullock's quirky, ditzy roles and feel that this one didn't really do her justice because all in all she is a good actress. Her role as Mary, who spends her life designing crosswords for the local paper and as a result doesn't earn enough to move out of her parent's house doesn't really fit with her more gutzy roles in other films. There is a difference in acting as a character who is funny and who is ditzy, and strangely enough although her character is extremely intelligent she comes across as slightly mental ( her character reminds me of Poppy in Happy Go-Lucky who goes through life never feeling depressed or affected by anything) and amazingly hyper. When she meets Steve, a bloke her parents set her up with she finds herself falling for him in more ways than one.

The film had a few laughs in it but altogether her character was far too annoying for me to find any sort of empathy with.

Downloading Nancy - 2009 * *

The first cut is not always the deepest.

This film is based on a really gruesome and disturbing story of a lady from America, who four years ago advertised on the internet for somebody to torture and murder her. They did.

The main character in the film, Nancy, is a self-harming, sado-masochistic housewife, whose boredom with her husband (played excellently by Rufus Sewell) leads her to run away into the arms of the man she strikes a friendship with on the internet. She has started a depraved cyber relationship with this man and they spend days at a time emailing about different forms of torture they would like to perform on each other and which ways she would like him to eventually kill her. There is no doubt that Nancy is a very mentally ill person ( she can't even get through a whole counselling session without rushing to the bathroom to self harm) and whilst she gives herself freely to this stranger I cannot help feel sorry for her that she allowed some man to take advantage of her this way. This film definately doesn't shy away from taboo subjects and I think I didn't like it because it made me uncomfortable (the acting was brilliant.)

Across The Hall - 2009 * * * *

Rooms are cheap, the night will cost you.

I have started to lap up films made by Brittany Murphy a year or so before her death and I came across this movie that no one seemed to have heard of. Now that I have seen it I can't believe it hasn't been more widely acclaimed because it really is a brilliant and terrifying film!

An unfaithful wife goes to spend the night in a hotel with her lover, but unknown to her, he has found out about her infidelity and has rented the room across the hall from hers where he is waiting with a shotgun...

The film brings an amazing amount of tension and atmosphere to the viewer and the flashbacks are actually very useful in this although I find they can just confuse me in a lot of films! I also think the acting was pretty great as well (Brittany Murphy is astounding) and you are hard pressed these days to find a film with great acting, story and attention to detail.

Thoroughly recommended.

Cinderella - 2006 * * *

It will mess with your head.

This is a strange film (obviously all tartan asia is strange!) and it kept my interest throughout. I didn't fully understand what was going on until about half way through but then everything seemed to snap into place. I ended up thinking the twist to the story was pretty amazing although the actors were rather annoying. Compared to my last helping of Asian Horror ( Ab-Normal Beauty) this was far superior.

Ab-Normal Beauty - 2004 * *

Drop Dead Beautiful.

Looked a great concept for a film. It wasn't. I didn't understand half the movie and I know I'll get slated for saying that I didn't like it because I didn't understand it but really when you feel like a movie is a blur what's to like?? So many scenes were just a mish-mash of ideas thrown together that it became unappealing almost immediatly and I don't mind saying I was watching the clock the whole time. The main character has an unhealthy obsession with photographing dead animals and people ( she photographs a girl who throws herself off the top of a building for goodness sake!) and through her photographs she starts to think she is going slightly mad. Add a sexual abuse storyline from ages ago into the mix and you have one mediocre excuse for a horror film.

I for one love murder mysteries such as Agatha Christie where the viewers (or readers) will find the culprit simply by eliminating unlikely suspects, so that at the end all the clues point to one person. You will not find that here, and I swear at the end of the film you will be so disappointed. One reviewer stated that 'the film makers are not obligated to present us at the beginning of the film with the main culprit or perpetrator to allow us an easy ride but actually it is usually desirable to save our sanity otherwise we have nothing to work with and no clues to follow when watching the film! Poorly made.

B.T.K - 2007 * *

Bind. Torture. Kill.

I've actually never heard of this serial killer which is strange because I'm pretty clued up famous murders in England and America.

Dennis Rader plays a middle-aged married man with devoted children who murders and tortures women in the evening. Kane Hodder is suitably eerie in the role and the acting is not bad, but the story hangs a bit thin and it didn't grip me.

Doghouse - 2009 * * *

On the p***, on the pull, on the menu.

Ok, I'm not about to say by any means that Danny Dyer is a brilliant or particularly talented actor, but if you want a film with some ready laughs and a bit of a stupid storyline involving zombie women then you should see this. All the blokes acting together are pretty funny and the idea that they are all on a long weekend to forget about divorces and nagging spouses is humorously ironic. A good Saturday night movie.

The Hills Run Red - 2009 * * *

Trespassers will be slaughtered.

This film reminded me quite a bit of the black horror comedy 'Hack' where a film is made about the legend of a film. I prefered Hack to this.

The film revolves around a guy named Tyler who is obsessed by the legend of 'The Hills Run Red' a movie that was supposedly banned a long time again because of the graphic and violent content. Conveniently he meets a stripper called Alexa who is the daughter of the mysterious movie director of the film and they set out into the woods along with Tyler's 2 friends to uncover the truth about the film. What follows is a serious of gruesome and typical scenes that you would find in most horror movies. Not worth a second watch, or really even a first.

The Good Die Young - 1954 * * * *

A full star robbery.

What a wonderful feeling it is to be presented with a movie that you normally wouldn't look twice at and in fact it ends up being a nail-biting ride with some brilliant acting. The story is simple - four men meet in a pub all are having problems at home, one man does not have enough money to take his wife away to New York to get her away from her controlling mother. Another is a gambler with a problem who has constantly relied on his wife for money until she refuses to help him settle a debt; all are in desperate need of money and all will do nearly anything to get it, the thing is can they trust their fellow men? This exciting film noir portrays some brilliant performances, especially from Stanley Baxter, Gloria Grahame and Joan Collins. Amazng.

Triangle - 2009 * *

Fear Comes in Waves.

This movie was talked about a lot last year. I decided I had to see it so last weekend I sat down to what I thought was going to be a brilliant and creepy story. Wrong. It was creepy yes, but it barely had anything to do with the Bermuda Triangle except for a bit at the beginning where a group of friends sail right into the centre by accident and are caught in a dreadful storm. One of the friends, Jess begins to act very strangely and the story progresses from there. In fact it progresses so fast that I barely took everything in. You really do have to have your wits about you because it's a case of blinking and missing parts that are important. The acting is nothing special, the story is muddled and to be honest I don't agree with all the raving reviews saying that you need to watch the movie lots of times to discover new depths. For me it's a one off and with such a pathetic ending that's how it will stay.