Jack the Giant Slayer - 2013 **

After how much I enjoyed 'Oz the Great and Powerful' I thought 'Jack the Giant Slayer' would be pretty good as well. I wasn't sure how they would 'modernise' the story of Jack but on the whole it couldn't of been closer if it had tried.
That annoying boy from 'About a Boy' is now all grown up and taking the main part of Jack, who feels a bit perturbed when he notices that a large beanstalk has sprouted in his house (he was entertaining the princess at the time and now she is at the op of the stalk) and decides to help the soldiers in their quest to find the princess at the top and also slaughter the massive troll who has probably taken her prisoner.
It's just a bit wishy-washy and nothing is really black and white. I didn't enjoy it.

(NOIR) Destination Murder - 1950 **

Another B-Noir, although this time I found it a lot less captivating than 'Slander.' The acting was pretty mediocre and I didn't find the story very good. A young woman tries to find the killer of her father and ends up infiltrating a dodgy world of gangsters and mobsters. There's danger, and I guess quite a few of the typical 'noir' points but it doesn't translate onto screen as well as it should have. 

(HORROR) Forget Me Not - 2009 **

This was another hopeless film supposedly deemed scary by who exactly?? I grant you that yes, the subject matter was slightly different to typical horror films (as each person dies it is as if they never existed) but really it wasn't strong enough to give this film a high rating. Another one of those 'revenge from the past' scenarios that didn't really make much sense at all.

(HORROR) Broken - 2006 *

 

 

'Broken' is certainly not a film to watch if you are pregnant or trying to be. It's very gruesome and can be quite upsetting in some scenes. Yet again though (like the above movie) the acting is really bad and it completely spoils the production. It was very slow as well and took about an hour to really get going. Even then nothing much happened out of the ordinary. Not worth your time. 

Unknown - 2011 ***

There's always a sense of wonder with these types of films about whether the conclusion is going to be nearly as good as everything else leads up to. Another being 'So Long at the Fair' which I happen to think is a brilliantly constructed movie with a very plausible ending. This however was not. It started off weirdly, did the whole 'suddenly no one recognises him,even his own wife. Why is that?' thing and then went off on a ridiculous ramble of pointlessness until the last few scenes which confused the hell out of me.
Liam Neeson is a wonderful actor but even he couldn't save this mish-mash of plot holes and hopeless, stupid explanations over something that turned out to be a complete waste of time.

The Magnificent Ambersons - 1942 ***

I seem to be going through a spate of disappointing films recently. This was an offering that I was sure would impress me, but actually it didn't, and the only positive thing I got from the film was watching Joseph Cotten prance around for an hour and a half. Nice to see Orson Welles giving the main part to Cotten (they bonded in 'The Third Man') but even the fact that he directed this film didn't mean it was worthwhile. Based on a book of the same name, but don't think I will be reaching for it quite yet.

The Killing of a Chinese Bookie - 1976 *

I have yet to find a John Cassavetes movie that I actually like. I didn't like this. I thought it was a mis-matched jumble of rubbishness and I was thoroughly unimpressed. The film ambles on at a really ridiculous pace with no aim or resolution. Very disappointed.

(NOIR) The Reckless Moment - 1949 ***

I actually thought this was a very mediocre film. It was slow and nothing much seemed to happen until the last few minutes which resulted in a bizarre and slightly over-the-top climax. Joan Bennett was very frumpy and I found her performance to be less than average. James Mason as the blackmailer turned good guy was about the only saving grace of the whole thing. A jumbled mistake that I wish I hadn't watched.

Boudu Saved From Drowning - 1932 ***

I'm strugglnig to come up with something good to say about this film, except that it was done by Jean Renoir. Other than that, this film was desperately disappointing, and even more so because I had waited years and years to see it. It was unfunny, uninteresting and generally uninspiring.
The film revolves around a tramp named Boudu who decides to end it all by drowning himself. Fortunately he is rescued by a nice family who try to look after him and lift his spirits but not before he has completely taken over their home and driven them up the wall.
Very sad to feel this way about the film especially seeing as 'Un Partie de Campagne' was so beautifully done.

The Vanishing - 1988 **

If you read the synopsis on Wikipedia about this film it makes it sound utterly riveting, but in reality, it drags on far too long, it's not particularly interesting, and I found the acting to be too over the top. And yes, I have also seen the remake and thought that was equally as apalling if not worse.

The idea of the disappearance is good, the idea of the obsessive boyfriend is good, and the eventual fate of one of the characters is also good, so why wasn't it better executed??

Why do we spend what seems like hours watching the boyfriend wander around aimlessly, when what he is doing could be expressed in half the time? I really didn't take to this version and I usually steadfastly stand by originals of horror and thriller movies.

Friends with Benefits - 2011 **

I watched 14 films this weeked, and the first was this 'comedy' from last year.

Now I love Mila Kunis, I think she's gorgeous, but Justin Timberlake really needs to stick to singing instead of trying to make people laugh because he DOESN'T.

People are branding this film as though it's a new and exciting idea for romantic comedy - the whole 'friends can sleep together without having any feelings for each other' is certainly not new.

Before you've even pressed play you know how the film is going to be, and that's the sad state of American comedy these days, that you can almost predict everything that is going to happen.

Kunis meets Timberlake at work. They are both damaged from previous relationships and believe that they can have meaningless sex without getting attached to each other. Of course that's not going to happen. More likely is that someone is going to get seriously hurt, considering the constant referral to how 'damaged' they are every half an hour. That's not even a spoiler, but just a general feeling I got about 15 minutes getting into the film.

The actors don't really seem to connect with each other, and there isn't much chemistry, and the film isn't even particularly funny. It's old hat. It's been done (I'm not sure where but surely it has??) and you are taken on an almost pointless trip that you really don't want to go on.

I haven't seen 'No Strings Attached' yet but have heard it's a bit like this? Not sure if I dare.

Never let me Go - 2010 **

I know I'm going to upset everyone here but I seriously disliked this film. I'm not sure if it is partly to do with the fact I couldn't understand what the hell was going on or whether the characters were so dreadfully unlikeable that I gave up the will to live. Keira Knightley wasn't on top form here, and Carey Mulligan was infuriating. The idea that these three characters had an intense love for each other throughout the movie was not examined in enough detail. I think maybe if I read the book it would give a more detailed look at their relationships, but here everything seemed very wishy-washy and dull. *SPOILERS* I understand that the characters are in effect born to donate their organs and that is their purpose in life, I also understand that maybe they don't react properly to certain situations because they are programmed not to, but I don't get why they act like robots for most of the movie. Even the 'emotional scenes' are devoid of any actual emotion. They seem to act the same whether they are happy are sad, and at the end of the day they are still humans and must have most of the same thoughts and feelings that others do.

Very weird, disjointed film. I didn't like it.

The Silent House - 2010 **

I thought this sounded a really interesting idea for a horror film when I first read about the style. All filmed in one single shot with no breaks. To my knowledge this has only ever been done with 2004's 'Russian Ark.' Anyway! It wasn't quite as interesting as I was hoping. I actually thought I was going to be seriously scared but obviously not, and on the whole, I find that foreign horror is generally much more atmospheric than English.

A girl and her father go to an old, remote cottage to clean it out and repair it as they know that the owner will soon be putting on the market. Once inside (all in one shot don't forget) they hear a strange noise from above and the father goes to investigate. Except he doesn't come back. And the girl is trapped.

On the contrary I actually found the continuous shot very annoying and completely lacking in tension, and it just sort of trundled along without much interest, despite the disturbing goings on.

Not one I would recommend, although the idea of a Uruguayan Spanish horror film did originally sound appealing.

Varsity Blues - 1999 **

Another stupid 'American Jock' type movie where the whole film and it seems the whole world revolves around football and nothing else, oh, except talking about football. I'm not actually sure why I forced myself to see it all the way through, as it barely went anywhere, but it was probably because I wanted to see whether the off-screen tension between James van der Beek and Paul Walker was evident on screen. Considering they only had about 2 minutes together on the whole film, it wasn't. Waste of time.

Hereafter - 2010 **

A Clint Eastwood film, so it must be brilliant. Nope. It's only directed by him, and it seems he doesn't shine as much in the directorial world as he does in the acting one.

A big fat mess of a movie, 'Hereafter' tries to cram complicated story after complicated story into the same place, mixing them up and jiggling them about, until you haven't got a clue what is going on. I'm not a huge fan of Matt Damon but even I was surprised that he appeared in a film like this. It's not even a mega religious movie, it doesn't give that much of a punch to the extent where people will be quarrelling over the religious factors after it's ended. It's just a pretty dire attempt at trying to look artistic by the director ('shame on you Clint!) and it fails miserably, with unfinished endings and totally uninventive characters.

(HORROR) The Rite - 2011 **

The two best things about 'The Rite' are Anthony Hopkins and the beautiful backdrop of Rome. Other than that this was a predictable, pretentious movie with the sort of storyline that has been done to death.

Hopkins stars as a powerful exorcist who guides a young seminary student through an exorcism course in Rome after the boy confesses to losing his faith (what a surprise). Both of them get more than they bargained for (no surprises there then!).

Hopkins is a superb actor but he really shouldn't have been in a film like this. He shouldn't be entering the world of rubbish American horror, but instead should stick to his charming English films that are so popular.

One last thing I will say however is that this is actually based on true events, as opposed to the fictional ones that you see on most horror posters now. Hopkins' character was real, and the story is pretty close as well (if you can believe everything that Wikipedia says). At least they didn't lie on that.

The Hangover 2 - 2011 **

The first Hangover film was ok. It was quite funny but nothing original. Maybe I've seen too many teen comedies, but there was barely no new material there at all.

It was obviously the wrong idea to watch the sequel, if I thought the first film was barely watchable this was even worse.

It's the same 3 men, this time stranded for some bizarre reason in Bangkok after having a drug induced session the night before. Throw in a monkey with a Rolling Stones tee shirt, a decapitated finger and some other stupid things, and you have pretty much the identical movie that happened before except this time with the added 'bonus' of the ghastly slum areas of the Bangkok underworld.

This film is completely overrated, and relies so heavily on various swear words that if you took them out you would only have about a quarter of the film.

Boring, unfunny, and dare I say it, completely 'American.'

(HORROR) The Torment - 2010 *

Absolutely diabolical. Why do I bother watching these supposed 'horror' films and then end up being continually disappointed???

Still, as usual I thought this would be different. And it wasn't.

A man breaks up with his girlfriend and goes to stay with his friend and his partner. Whilst there, he experiences some horrifying things.

Really bad. I don't think any movie to do with possession has really scared me in the last few years, except maybe 'An American Haunting.'

Cries and Whispers - 1972 **

What a disappointment. And very strange because this is the second colour Bergman film I've seen and the first was equally dark and unexciting.

On a contrast, all the black and white ones were amazing that I have seen so far. This film was based around illness, and infidelity, and negativity and so it's hardly something you might want to watch if you were hoping for something happy.

It has the same sad and melancholy tones as 'Autumn Sonata' (which was the other colour one I saw). Maybe his films are meant only for b&w.

I couldn't enjoy it, maybe for it's dreadfully depressing storyline.

The Leopard - 1963 **

At almost three hours long, this film sucked most of the enthusiasm I had originally mustered for it clean out my body.

I have no idea why Burt Lancaster was in this movie. This is an Italian movie, and Mr Lancaster most certainly isn't an Italian.

Added to which the movie had sub-titles but was dubbed as well. Pointless. I thought that a film so long would at least have had some endearing quality to it, but in my opinion it didn't.

I was not impressed and was just disappointed.