(NOIR) Night and the City - 1950 ** 1/2

Although this is always thought of as one of the best noirs out there I was completely uninterested and underwhelmed by it. I've seen a fair few noirs so do have some sort of idea as to how they work. This was a noir certainly, but the acting (completely over the top by Richard Widmark) was appalling, and the story crumbled as it went on. Based around a crooked named Harry Fabien (Widmark) and his decline into the underworld of criminal activity and illegal wrestling this film pulled barely any punches, and I was left gobsmacked by the ridiculous if not slightly laughable ending. Gene Tierney is beautiful but even she couldn't save this film, or Herbert Lom, and Googie Withers fell very short of the grade as well. Added to which, for a film set in the 1930s it had a surprisingly 1950s feel to it (which is hardly surprising).

Last Night - 2011 ***

'Last Night' is one of those annoying films where if you have particular morals or views on infidelity it will irritate you no end.

Keira Knightley was probably the best thing about the film, as Sam Worthington's acting was utterly wooden and dull, and Eva Mendes' face is the wrong shape.

Knightley and Worthington play a married couple who so far seem to be enjoying married life. But he has to go off with work overnight with a colleague whom he has admitted to being attracted to, leaving Knightley alone. She then happens to bump into her old flame Alex (who she never really got over) who offers to take her out for dinner, and both Knightley and Worthington have that night to decide whether to resist or surrender to the temptation in front of them. (No prizes for guessing what they both do).

This film is realistic to a degree, but it also poses the typical adage that no one can resist temptation if they are handed it on a plate which I don't happen to agree with. Worth a watch.

The Vanishing - 1988 **

If you read the synopsis on Wikipedia about this film it makes it sound utterly riveting, but in reality, it drags on far too long, it's not particularly interesting, and I found the acting to be too over the top. And yes, I have also seen the remake and thought that was equally as apalling if not worse.

The idea of the disappearance is good, the idea of the obsessive boyfriend is good, and the eventual fate of one of the characters is also good, so why wasn't it better executed??

Why do we spend what seems like hours watching the boyfriend wander around aimlessly, when what he is doing could be expressed in half the time? I really didn't take to this version and I usually steadfastly stand by originals of horror and thriller movies.

Easy-A - 2010*

A hideous attempt by American film-makers to produce a comedy based around a girl who chooses to ruin her 'good girl' image by letting people think she is a sl** then starts to worry when it backfires. I'm not sure what the point of the movie is, unless it's to give us an idea of what people in America do at school? Or how fickle people can be when judging someone they don't even know?It doesn't paint American students in the best light really, or American teenage girls if you want to be pedantic. It really was garbage and I'm ashamed to have taken the time to watch it.

Jack and Sarah - 1995 ***

I was convinced that I wouldn't care about this film enought to cry before I started watching it. But I did. And it was all because of Richard E.Grant and his emotional acting. I didn't care much for Samantha Mathis, and I wasn't a huge fan of the baby either, but I was absorbed by Grant's painful transition from husband and father-to-be to widow and father of one. He acted the way I believe a lot of men would after the loss of their wife, but wouldn't like to admit. I think Richard E. Grant is wonderful, so he really made this film for me. A lot of people say that it's not a very funny comedy, but I don't personally believe it's supposed to be. I think it's a drama with some comic moments thrown in. Bit of a difference.

Bull Durham - 1988 *

This in my opinion was a very poor excuse for a comedy. I kept seeing it floating around Amazon and decided just to watch it and see what all the fuss was about.

To put it bluntly, the fuss was about nothing. It was rubbish. It's about a baseball player who becomes attracted to a baseball groupie who has an affair with a baseball player each season. That's about it. What a waste of time. Susan Sarandon isn't at her best here, and neither is Kevin Costner. A boring film. Not funny at all. Am amazed that Billy Wilder said he liked it.

Bridesmaids - 2011 **

I thoroughly disliked this film. I hear that people are raving about it and calling it original, well I guess it is, but that doesn't mean it's any good. Wills and Kate reportedly went to see it and found it very funny, so I'm not sure what I'm missing.

All the characters were deeply unlikeable especially the lead blonde woman who comes across as a very selfish human being. The bride is weird, the other bridesmaids just sort of fade into the background, and the men have the most ridiculous accents you have heard. Am not sure either why Matt Lucas (who is British down to his socks) is being paired with a 'sister' who has a heavy Australian/South African accent. Something isn't right there. I do despair for modern comedy I really do, it just seems to be disappointment after disappointment.

Nights in Rodanthe - 2008 ***

If I hear that one more of Nicholas Spark's books has been made into a film I may check into an asylum. Sparks has a knack of producing almost identically themed stories, usually to do with relationships and loss and drawing them out until the reader just gives up.

He's done the same here, and this time Gere and Lane have teamed up once again to portray two characters that can either make you sob into your cushion or glare at angrily throughout the whole movie.

Lane goes to her friend's beach house to get away from a difficult marriage, and Gere goes with the initial idea of reconnecting with his estranged son. They are the only two people there, and therefore start talking and realising that they have things in common. One thing leads to another etc etc. Then a tragic accident changes everything. There is one very emotional moment towards the end, but I really think if you want a weepie it would be best to go for 'Bridges of Madison County' (which this film reminds me a lot of).

I like Gere as an actor, and Diane Lane isn't bad, but I think I preferred them both in 'Unfaithful.'

Bitter Moon - 1992 **

Hugh Grant was his usual irritating self in this, and I was completely put off by seeing Emmanuelle Seigner's eyebrows which seemed bigger than her whole head. Polanski is a bit of a hit or miss with me (a bit like Steve Martin) and although it was a fairly interesting look into a couple's relationship, it didn't do anything for me. Grant's morals seem continually absent in most of his films and they were no different here. He comes on a luxury cruise with his other half Fiona (Scott Thomas) and is almost immediatly obsessing over Seigner despite the fact that she is there with her crippled husband and doesn't actually seem very interested in him anyway. Her husband pulls Grant to one side and begins to tell him the story of how they met and fell in love. Grant isn't interested to start with but then becomes infatuated with everything he says. Meanwhile Fiona is feeling sea-sick and being irritating to little children.

Polanski's films always have a dark nature to them, but I found this just a bit much, and can't say I enjoyed it.

The Lonely Guy - 1984 *** 1/2

I can take or leave Steve Martin. Sometimes I think he's hilarious, and at other times his face annoys me. This time however I was quite amused (what a surprise, a funny film not from modern day Hollywood) at Martin's bumbling excuse of a man who always has bad luck, from catching his girlfriend in bed with someone else, to meeting a man who keeps threatening to commit suicide, to resorting to fake sweat to attract women after pretending he has been on a 10 mile run and so on. Martin's very dry, and some people won't get his sense of humour. And sometimes I don't. But here I did. And I had a couple of laugh out loud moments which rarely happens.

Friends with Benefits - 2011 **

I watched 14 films this weeked, and the first was this 'comedy' from last year.

Now I love Mila Kunis, I think she's gorgeous, but Justin Timberlake really needs to stick to singing instead of trying to make people laugh because he DOESN'T.

People are branding this film as though it's a new and exciting idea for romantic comedy - the whole 'friends can sleep together without having any feelings for each other' is certainly not new.

Before you've even pressed play you know how the film is going to be, and that's the sad state of American comedy these days, that you can almost predict everything that is going to happen.

Kunis meets Timberlake at work. They are both damaged from previous relationships and believe that they can have meaningless sex without getting attached to each other. Of course that's not going to happen. More likely is that someone is going to get seriously hurt, considering the constant referral to how 'damaged' they are every half an hour. That's not even a spoiler, but just a general feeling I got about 15 minutes getting into the film.

The actors don't really seem to connect with each other, and there isn't much chemistry, and the film isn't even particularly funny. It's old hat. It's been done (I'm not sure where but surely it has??) and you are taken on an almost pointless trip that you really don't want to go on.

I haven't seen 'No Strings Attached' yet but have heard it's a bit like this? Not sure if I dare.

Never let me Go - 2010 **

I know I'm going to upset everyone here but I seriously disliked this film. I'm not sure if it is partly to do with the fact I couldn't understand what the hell was going on or whether the characters were so dreadfully unlikeable that I gave up the will to live. Keira Knightley wasn't on top form here, and Carey Mulligan was infuriating. The idea that these three characters had an intense love for each other throughout the movie was not examined in enough detail. I think maybe if I read the book it would give a more detailed look at their relationships, but here everything seemed very wishy-washy and dull. *SPOILERS* I understand that the characters are in effect born to donate their organs and that is their purpose in life, I also understand that maybe they don't react properly to certain situations because they are programmed not to, but I don't get why they act like robots for most of the movie. Even the 'emotional scenes' are devoid of any actual emotion. They seem to act the same whether they are happy are sad, and at the end of the day they are still humans and must have most of the same thoughts and feelings that others do.

Very weird, disjointed film. I didn't like it.

Lady Godiva Rides Again AKA Bikini Baby - 1951 **

I thought apart from the exceptional Kay Kendall who is fabulous in everything, that this movie was pretty bad. Diana Dors isn't what I would call a good actress, I mean she is very beautiful but that's where her talents end in my opinion. A small town girl enters a beauty contest and wins. She is swept up in the high life and as a result, begins to neglect her close friend and boyfriend. I must say it toally missed the split second where we see Ruth Ellis, and that may well have been the only good, interesting thing about the movie. (Oh, and Alastair Sim had a small part as well)

(HORROR) The Innkeepers - 2011 **

Sorry, but this was a very poor excuse for a horror film. Sara Paxton is pretty rubbish and nothing much was going on here that would hold anyone's attention for long.

The Yankee Pedlar inn is closing, and the two employees who have been chosen to work until the end are determined to reveal and document the hotel's haunted past. This includes making a website and filming 'ghostly' activity.

Some of it was a bit eerie, but on the whole what annoyed me the most was Sara Paxton's stupid face looked concerned and worried in equal amounts. There is only so much of it one can take.

(HORROR) Megan is Missing - 2011 ****

'Megan is Missing' is a very powerful film. Although it's based on true events (actually its based on a number of cases not just one) it still manages to come across as terrifying. It's a warning to all people out there never to trust what people say over a computer screen, and to always go with someone else when you are going to meet them. Sadly younger girls are awfully naive when it comes to this sort of thing, and can become embroiled in situations beyond their control.

Megan is a popular, confident and pretty 15 year old girl, who enjoys promiscuous enocunters with guys, partying and doing drugs. Her 13 year old best friend Amy is the complete polar opposite, shy, insecure and quiet, but somehow, the two girls are very close and perfectly compatible. When Megan starts talking to a boy on the internet, all she can think of is when and where they can meet, and without telling Amy where she is going, she disappears. A few days later Amy is also gone.

An important film to watch, and very upsetting in some scenes, but actually one of the better 'lost footage' movies of it's time.

(HORROR) The Clinic - 2011 *

First of all, 'WHAT??!' My BFF was over for film day yesterday and I stupidly thought this would be a great film for us to laugh at. I was under the impression (because I hadn't bothered to read up about the plot) that it was about a plastic surgery clinic and that therefore we would be taking the mickey out of girls with boob jobs gone wrong, but actually it turned out to be another kind of clinic.And it was bloody awful.

A heavily pregnant woman and her fiance (what a surprise!!) break down on the way to their in-laws (what a surprise!!) on Christmas Eve (what a surprise!!) and decide to take shelter in a weird looking motel, the only one open for miles around (again, what a bloody surprise). The girl goes to sleep, the man goes out to look for Chinese food in the middle of the night (as you do) and when he returns, the girl has disappeared. For god's sake, when are we going to have a horror film without millions of stupid cliches that totally ruin the atmosphere???Just watch the trailer, read about it on imdb and you won't have to bother actually seeing the whole film. I implore you.