(HORROR) Fear Lives Here - 2012 **

What more excitement could one viewer have that watching a whole film about a group of idiots who get stranded in a remote area whilst hiking and end up spending most of the evening in their car. Oh, and they do encounter a strange ghostly boy who appears and disappears every now and again. It's awfully predictable and turns into something even worse. The characters in these films are always so thick that it doesn't surprise me that they die in such stupid/hilarious ways. This is no exception.

 

(HORROR) The Mooring - 2012 *

Another pathetic excuse for genuine horror, this movie takes awful actors and clumps them into an even worse setting where they have to be weaned off their addiction to technology (surely there are worse addictions you could have?!) and in doing so, mean a scary girl with yellow teeth who's boyfriend is a total nut job. The acting is so bad it makes you want to throw yourself out of a window. It's definitely one of the weakest storylines in a horror as well.

(HORROR) Roadside Massacre - 2012 *

Ranking as one of the very worst horror movies I have seen. In the last week. (Because let's face it, I see dire horror movies every week) A group of five friends take a detour on the way to their spring break destination, and on the way get sucked into the cannibalistic goings on that occur at the local BBQ joint. Hilarious scenes of eating other people in BBQ form, hysterical sex scenes in barns and terrifying eyebrows are just some of the delights that you will encounter. It's a yawnfest, and the characters are so stupid that it beggars belief that they can function at all, let alone drive a car.

(HORROR) Reel Evil - 2012 *

It's a shame that so many found footage movies have to be so awful and so very tedious. This is no exception, and though it looks highly ridiculous from the poster I had decided to give it a chance anyway. But I shouldn't have bothered. It was the same awful rubbish as I have seen countless times.
People have to film a documentary in an old building and become terrified by unseen ghosts and ghouls etc. Except we do see the 'ghost' and she's enough to give me a tremendous fit of the giggles. I should try and stop watching these types of movies because I am always disappointed, but somehow I can't quite press the stop button.

(HORROR) Among Friends - 2012 ***

Average, independent horror movie about a group of self obsessed friends who go to a lieder mystery evening held by the snobbiest friend of all. Things start getting a bit creepy when she goes loopy and starts cutting off her friend's scalps and decapitating their fingers after revealing home truths about each one of them. 

It's quite original and not badly acted although a bit silly.

(HORROR) You Can't Kill Stephen King - 2012 *

VERY bad. Very, very bad. A group of friends go to a lake where Stephen King is said to have worked and stayed and are murdered in ridiculous ways one at a time. That's pretty much the gist of the film. It's totally silly and not scary in the slightest, not even in a 'so bad it's good way.' Avoid if you value your time. 

(HORROR) Devoured - 2012 ***

Not a bad movie. A young mother is working in America to earn enough money to send back to her mother to pay for her son's operation. She works the night shift cleaning in a restaurant and finds the work boring and demeaning, as well as come across some unpleasant characters who try to take advantage of her. Before long she starts to see things that aren't there in the dead of night, alone in the restaurant, and is unsure whether she is going mad or not. Lead actress was a good choice. 

Antiviral - 2012 ***

Imagine if you were so obsessed with a celebrity that you chose to have a virus that they are suffering from have injected into your body. This film is about just that. A clinic which uses viruses from sick celebrities to inject into crazed fans who are hoping to 'become connected' to their idols. It is of course, quite likely that you will die if the virus is bad enough. The injections and treatments are all performed in a very controlled and serious way, almost as if the idea is normal. This is what makes the film so terrifying. There are also 'butcher' shops that fans can go to to buy meat that is grown from the cells of celebrities. The whole film is really twisted. To be honest, it reminds me a bit of 'Delicatessen' and I will probably think about it for days.
Although the film is meant to shock because of it's plot, I suspect that maybe the director was trying to get across the vast obsession we as as population have with famous people, and how being besotted with these individuals can sometimes damage our health and put our lives at stake.
Quirky and dark, morbidly terrifying and original.

Heroine - 2012 ***

'Heroine' is an ironically bittersweet movie about the highs and lows of celebrity.
A young actress at the peak of her profession gradually becomes overshadowed by newer talent, causing her to take up low budget and independent films that hurt her career. She is also in the middle of a messy relationship with a co-star, who soon replaces her for someone else.
At the start she is a diva, and towards the end she is at her lowest ebb.
It's fascinating to watch really, as I'm sure film stars do have to deal with this sort of thing constantly. Always watching their back for the 'newer model' and knowing that one wrong word or picture can leave them with nothing.
Filming was marred for a time when one a rising star ( Meenakshi Thapar )who had a bit part in the film was kidnapped and murdered by 2 colleagues she met on the set. This, and the story matter, makes the film seem all the more gritty and real. Very sad what people will do for celebrity and money.
Worth a watch if you love Bollywood, beautiful dresses and catchy tunes however. 

Virtual Lies - 2012 **

'Virtual Lies' is what happens when sad, middle aged men who are bored in their marriages find solace in chatting to women online. This is what happens to Jamie when her husband Will gets drawn into the shadowy world of cyber-chatting to a woman named Allison. When his wife finds out, Will decides to stop speaking to Allison, but she has other ideas and won't let him go that easily.

Mediocre film. 

Me and You - 2012 *

Very slow film about a quiet boy who pretends to be going on a week long school skiing trip and instead spends the week in his mother's basement with his favourite food and books.His tranquility is disturbed by the arrival of his stepsister who is in the middle of coming off drugs and needs a place to crash.
It's not much of a film, and the lead actor is incredibly annoying and uncommunicative.

The Paperboy - 2012 *****

I would expect anyone with an ounce of a brain to approach this with trepidation after seeing Zac Efron's name on the poster.

Seriously, I haven't seen anything like this ever before, but it was amazing. I really loved it. It sort of reminded me of 'In the Heat of the Night'. In many scenes you can almost feel the heat and sweat dripping off the characters. Nicole Kidman was the standout performance here although I must say (and I'm going to get shot for saying this) but Zac Efron wasn't as bad as I thought he was going to be. The story revolves around John Cusack's character who is languishing in jail after being found guilty of murder. Nicole Kidman is his adoring but spunky pen pal, who, believing that he is innocent, teams up with two reporters to try and investigate the story and ultimately clear his name. 

Kidman's makeup is fantastic, and her character is so gutsy and savvy that she becomes the centre of Efron's infatuation. 

This is a brilliant film. Kudos to director Lee Daniels for coming up with such an excellent end result. 

(HORROR) Citadel - 2012 *

'Citadel' has to be one of the worst horror films I have seen in recent times. The acting is actually appalling and the story is ridiculous. After losing his wife in a horrific attack by a group of feral children, the puny husband meets a priest who tells him that the children are after his baby and that they have to put a stop to them. Its just awful.

Stalked at 17 - 2012 ***

A young student named Angela begins a relationship with an older good looking man named Chad. Things start well, but as time goes by, Chad becomes more and more controlling towards Angela, especially when she finds out that she is pregnant. Her parents are disgusted, especially because of Chad's age.
Angela is content to let Chad go, but Chad has other ideas.
Quite hard to watch, but even so, worth a look.

(HORROR) Donner Pass - 2012 **

This was a strange film. Based on the legend of (yes, you've got it) Donner Pass. A place where a group of people were stranded over 150 years ago and forced to eat each other. Fast forward to the present day and you have a group of annoying teenagers (how unusual) who are being targeted by an unknown assailant who appears to want to eat them. (Why are all 'targeted teens' in theses films so unlikeable and stupid?')
I'm all for legends, but when you incorporate it with such ridiculous people and such a dire ending, you realise there is nothing left for horror as a genre to offer.

(HORROR) The Apparition - 2012 *

A couple begin to experience scary and unsettling things in their home which they later find out is the result of a college experiment that has unleashed something very evil into the air.
There is really not a huge amount I can say in favour of this film. Tom Felton from 'Harry Potter' is in it, but that doesn't mean much when you think of how awful the film actually comes across.
Not worth a watch.

(HORROR) 100 Bloody Acres - 2012 ***

This reminds me a bit of 'Tucker and Dale Vs Evil' except that the other was actually funny. Gruesome and gory horror shouldn't be funny. Those two genres don't go together unless you are a very clever director. They don't really work at all here, and half the time I don't know if they are trying to be humorous or just seem to be sadistic. A couple of country 'businessmen' are making a mint in dealing fertiliser using a special recipe (namely, the blood and bones of murdered travellers). At the same time, three unwitting adults are on their way to a festival when their car breaks down, just next to the van of one of these men.
Just not a very good story.
Give it a miss.

(HORROR) Evidence - 2012 ***

Starts off quite well for a 'found footage' movie, but then descends into a complete chaotic mess. At the end it's really just absurd and I don't really get it. Saying that I don't get many horror movies but I still continue to watch them. To be fair there are a few jumpy moments which is more than can be said for many horror movies.

(HORROR) No Tell Motel - 2012 *

Although the title of the film is a sneak preview of how bad the movie actually is, the premise looks quite good. It's not. It's one of those awful films that you realise 20 minutes in is going to get worse and worse. I'm not one to give up on films half way through and usually try and stick them out if I can. I sort of wished I had done that here. I like movies based around haunted buildings, but only if when you finally see the ghost or entity, it's actually worthwhile. This was sort of a joke, and there was no way it was going to induce any sort of fear in me.
Loads more horror films with greater ratings. This was a waste of time.

I, Anna - 2012 ***

Quite a decent thriller, and I suppose it does have 'film noir' qualities about it, but parts of the film lagged, and I was a tad disappointed with Charlotte Rampling's performance (especially as she is usually brilliant). Gabriel Byrne plays a troubled DI who is covering the case of a man murdered in his flat. By chance, he becomes enthralled by Anna, a mysterious and lonely woman who seems to know more about the murder than she lets on. Is she involved?
Quite a good experience, but certain things just didn't hold my interest.